Maui's Sex Addiction

Yes, I am afraid that it's true. In addition to being an alcoholic, I am also a sex addict. My lover sometimes is not available as frequently as I desire, so I am forced to have sex with my Mommy. But now she has cut me off too, so I have resolved myself to my hand. It's awful to have to admit to you, my fans, but I am hoping someone will read this confession and offer me a solution. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!