Style and Have to Ask Why

So, my mommy went to the Cheesecake Factory last night and met her friend. She didn't bring me back any left overs, but I digress, not that I didn't put in my order before she left. Anyway, she came home and described some of the outfits that she saw when she was waiting. Two shades of lime on one outfit to just name a few. Clothes that don't fit right and rolls exposed. I told her that there are simple rules to fashion and I will share them with you, my loyal reader.
1. Never, but NEVER wear a print. Solid colors only
2. If you wear a crazy color, ie lime or pink, that is the only color that you wear. You offset with white it's not a dress.
3. Wear clothes that fit "squeezing" into anything is never appropriate.
4. For women high heels are a must, they dress up any outfit.
5. Don't wear anything that rests below or above the naval if you can remember Reagan's policies.
6. Hair, please, don't be one of those who can say I have never changed my hair style since high school.
7. Finally, jewelry. Don't bother if it's not real.

Oprah

As my loyal readers know, I hate Oprah for reasons that are obvious. But I think I have finally figured out why people love Oprah, she's the new prophet. You can worship her from the ease of your couch with your Cheetoos and Budweiser and you don't have to put out your butt. No wonder she has so many loyal followers. In addition much like a religious leader she doesn't have to have any kind of scientific proof for what she preaches as gospel. The only thing that throws me in her wide appeal is that she is BLACK. I wouldn't have thought that there would be so many worshippers with that drawback, but then again makes all the more sense why nothing she says is backed by an educated opinion.

When It's Time....

....to go the key is realizing it. For instance with me I know when it's time to go back to my house because I start biting people randomly. In contrast humans have a hard time knowing when it's time to go. Animals are better at realizing when their environment is changing and for sheer survival sake it's time to move on to greener pastures. But humans don't seem to understand that once minorities move into your neighbor they are not leaving and once a camper has it's wheels off it's not moving. The only thing that I can think of is that humans don't want to believe it because they are still able to meet their daily needs even though they may have to install an alarm.