Cardinal Law

I make no bones about it I'm a die hard Jew. But I was watching a special on the Catholic Church the other night and have decided that they must be following these norms with regards to priests' behavior:

Molest a boy - off to a new parish where you can spread the good word
Molest a girl - mandatory counseling
Rape a young boy - automatic buy to the next round where you'll be crowned bishop
Rape several boys - congratulations you've earned yourself the title, Cardinal
Cover up your priest's crimes and deny them - free relocation trip to Rome
Partake in a hate crime by murdering thousands of innocent Jews - we will call you Pope


Do as I say, not as I do for I'm a Catholic not a Jew.

Shut Down!

We've all heard the mob say, "we are going to shut you down" or "we are going to run you out of town". Well, I can tell you that I have lived it. After I posted "Thwarted", I found that my precious blog was literally shut down. I was stunned. I got the message loud and clear. However, my Mommy was dumb enough to get it back up and running, so now I can't hide. I am thinking about changing my name to something very Italian sounding. What about Maurice Anthony Feldmani - if it ends in a vowel it will pass for Italian, right? And I am strongly considering having some plastic surgery. I think that I am going to start with my beak. It's awful that I have to think like this now, but I am a survivor.

Thwarted

I think I may have outrun the mob. The "godfather" hasn't been back in awhile, but his boys were here last week. I think that they just want me to know that you are never truly rid of them. I simply ignored them and acted like their presence didn't ruffle my feathers in the least. Luckily, my room allows me to see far and wide, so they can't sneak up on me. Also, luckily or unluckily, the white thing that licks its ass barks whenever something seems strange. If you try to go in a parking lot where there is a "Dollar Store", you'll see what I mean about her. She is hardly subtle...sometimes I wonder if she isn't Jewish. I am just keeping my cool and smarts about me and am waiting for the next threat to be delivered. I think it may affect my pizza supply as I have noticed lately that I have been running low.