At Least the Seagulls are Good for Something!

Well, my friends - we did it! Ohbama lost in the New Hampshire Primary. I knew my well thought out plan would work. The seagulls more than anyone I know hate the thought of Ohbama in the White House. Of course, the seagulls being white would understand my plight and realize what a catastrophy Ohbama would be if this thing went any further. Did you see the cover of Time? "Our time has come" - after the Iowa victory. Although at that point I already had my plan set, I knew that there could be no room for error. The seagulls and I secretly met two nights before the primary. We purposely did not include the pigeons in the meeting because in the Bird World they are considered the "Puerto Ricans" of the species and you never know they might start to sympathize with the Ohbama supporters and especially given Iowa with only the pigeons. Our meeting involved mapping out major highways and thwarting possible voters before they made it to the polls. The seagulls loaded up on carbohydrates and fish the night before the elections. There was one bus on I-95 carrying Black Christians - the seagulls could hear them singing and see the bus rocking with their clapping and hollering - before they launched their attack. The bus was surrounded by seagulls and that is when the shit flew literally. At first they did not notice, but the driver had to stop the bus because he could not see the cars in front of him. Aaaahh, the sweet smell of victory. I am not a Hillary lover, but I will take a lesbian with a sham of a marriage if I have no other choice. Onward to the Democratic nominations - when we employ the hawks.