FROM FAT TO FAG

Finally, I took the time to prove my hypothesis with the help of the Canadians through a much needed grant from Obama. Although I did not state truly what I was researching, I managed to hood wink the President like much the rest of the world and secure my funds. It's true fat people have more than their fair share of fags. That's right once the shape is gone, so are the inclinations for the opposite sex. The evidence is indisputable...especially, amongst lesbians. In the future I plan to also conduct a study linking man haircuts among women with queerness. However, the funds for that one won't be as costly as it seems rather obvious. I plan on following women and once they ask for blade number 2 I will know that I have a subject for the study. For men if there is hair dye involved they will become an unknowing participant as well. Then I am going to hit the churches and call out the priests. For this study I am going to make them prove that they are not gay, I will ask questions like which strip club do you want to go to "Hurricane Betty's" or "Chippendales". I will watch closely for eyes darting and looking down as they respond, which will make their verbal answer irrevelant. I will find them and out them at every level. I know no boundaries and I will stop at nothing. This tactic will be the next Crusade.