They Call It Grafton

I know that Grafton has not made the record books as a work camp, but let me tell you it is. Last time my Mommy was in Florida I was in the Chicopee state prison, but this time I'm in a work camp, Grafton. We rise at 5 AM and begin our choirs for the day. This week it's painting. I am forced to inhale toxic fumes and dance on command. Then at the end of the day I'm returned to my cell, where I am provided with bread and water. I am forced to listen to Dean Martin, it's a form of torture, noise pollution. I don't know how much longer I can keep up this hectic pace. I am running on nothing everyday. I try to run and hide in my cage, but I am always found.

A New Low

I'm here in Grafton with a guard that wants to eat me. Her name is Truffles and I think that she is a lesbian given that she has a beard that she sports with pride. I digress... Apparently, my "grandpapa" felt that I needed a bath. I take baths in a bathroom sink, where I can easily climb in and out on my towel. Then I am blown dry and allowed to groom my feathers and have a cigarette. Well, that is not the case in Grafton. I am hauled off to an unheated garage, where I am dumped into a kitchen sink. Don't they know that I can't swim? I panic and flap my wings while Truffles jumps out trying to get on the counter, so even if I make it she will eat me. Is it me or have I sunk to a new low?

Libraries

My Mommy is in Florida and I told her that she has to find "safe places", where there are not any black people. Of course, there is the obvious pool or ocean because as we all know they don't swim. Think about it when have you seen Obama in water. He never mentions the White House pool. But my Mommy needs to be able to leave the grounds and find a "safe place" in case of a hurricane. I had my people search for her and they informed me that the safest place is the public library. Again, who bought and read Obama's book - white people who want to feel righteous that's who. So, if you are looking for a safe place where you won't be licked, my mommy's friend, Jim, let us in on the lingo that means "robbed" go to your local library!

Oprah's a Cult Leader

I think I have figured it out - why Oprah is so loved. Besides, the obvious that people are fat, dumb pigs, I think that they are needy. They are looking for their savoir. Oprah is the biggest cult leader of them all. Time and time again what she promotes, especially in the line of books, prove to be complete lies and yet people keep worshipping. Americans for whatever reason want someone to follow. I will never understand it. Newsweek has an article, which lines my cage, about the fall of Christian America. I have a theory - it's because of the rise of Oprah America.

A Reason

I love when people say that there is a reason for something bad happening it ranks right up there with it's God's way. Let me clue you in there isn't "a reason" and God's way is nonexistent. "The reason" is scientific and looking beyond that for a reason is simply absurd. I love when I hear someone say "I have a learning disability" for a reason. And what reason would that be? To make you stupid....it's ridiculous. The reason you have the learning disability is scientifically based and that's where it starts and stops. No one ever challenges someone either when they say they are sick for "a reason". Instead, everyone nods their head and shamefully agrees. Of course, these same people pray for an answer or think that their attitude will make a difference in the outcome. It won't - studies have proven that. But people keep doing it. I often wonder if humans are not the smartest and dumbest animal all wrapped into one. How can they have the ability to reason and yet are so unable to employ it? I just don't understand it. I think in some ways animals are smarter. Although they lack much human intellect, in the same breath that doesn't get in the way of their ability to reason life and death, strong and weak.

I'm Afraid

My Mommy is getting rid of "stuff" as she puts it. I'm not talking trash. She is giving away text books, which I am okay with that. She has cleaned out closets - again I could care less. But now she is rearranging pictures. I have lost some of my artwork near my house. I think though that she has lost it because today she threw out yearbooks, graduation caps and her hood. Who's to say one bad scream from me and I'm not next?

Explosions

No, I'm not talking about 9/11 and besides that was an implosion. Any idiot could see that? Well, I take that back not the ones who still think that we landed on the moon! I'm talking about the next "big thing" - Oprah. I am putting my bird seed down now that by June she will have exploded. I am willing to take wagers on it. My God how much bigger can she get? Gayle, her lover, looks petite next to her. We all know that isn't true.