Saturday, September 10, 2011

Florida

Well, here I am in a tropical paradise living in the closet. I'm not gay..I'm literally living in a closet. I can't believe this is the life that I've been driven to nearly 1400 miles. I blame Daddy for it. I was put in a little cage in the middle of the night and into the front seat of Mommy's Miata. We drove through the dark and the rain only to end up in a closet. WTF? On our way we got thrown out of a Fairfield Inn, which apparently I'm being blamed for due to my vocal abilities. Instead, we had to stay in a seedy hotel run rampant with blacks. We booked out of there at 330 AM, which was just as good with me. We jumped back onto 95 and I was promised it would be better a day. Well, here am in a sunny place locked in a closet. Rumor has it that the rat and Daddy are going to join us in a week or so...great! I don't really understand then why we left in the dead of the night if they are only going to follow us anyway. What was the point? I should have known when he kept calling on the blue tooth that he would track us down. At one point in the ride I tried to hang myself, but I failed and just got my foot stuck in my cozy. Pathetic, I know. Mommy didn't even pull over to help me, something about merging with traffic. Before I tried to hang myself she decided to take a detour in New York City little did I know it was just to give me a sampling of what we would be staying with that night. When am I going to realize that nothing with her is "random" and that Daddy is behind all of it?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hear you have a new "home" complete with a gym. What are you complaining about -you're Gram misses go figure - but that may be the wine talking. See you in January - hopefully you'll get past the bird holiday intact.

Anonymous said...

Don't know why ur always so down on your daddy. He doesn't even seem to be involved in half of your "incidents."

Anonymous said...

Are you living in a new closet now?

:)